The Four Kinds of Dream Killers, What Weapons They Use, and How to Fight Back

A dream is a very vulnerable thing. It is often is just an idea; an impractical plan; a vision of what could be, but rarely happens. It causes the dreamer to be vulnerable to criticism, especially when it seems like the odds are not in their favor. Life itself can be a dream killer. But it is the people around us that are often the most effective dream killers.

I wanted to write this post about those people. A dream killer is exactly what it sounds like: one that kills a dream. As someone who is striving to make a career in the entertainment industry, I am faced with dream killers often. So based on my experiences and the experiences of others, I decided to think up different kinds of dream killers. I will outline how dream killers tend to function, as well as speak of how the dreamer can overcome the negativity and keeping their hopes and goals into perspective.

The Hater

If you break up haters into the well-known acronym, it stands for "Having Anger Towards Everyone Reaching Success." They ridicule and demean an artist's talent or drive. Their actions and commentary are often irrelevant and unnecessarily pessimistic. Haters can be friends, acquaintances, relatives, or strangers. Some haters are direct while others are indirect. Some do the hating for their own sadistic purposes, while others focus solely on bringing the individual down. Their weapon is their insecurities, which they try to balance with their harsh behaviors. They are mainly dissatisfied with their own lives and feel the need to bring down someone to their level to pacify their own situations.

How to deal with a hater?
There are two different ways to deal with haters. The first is to simply ignore them. Haters thrive off of attention. Do not give in to the temptation of retaliating harshly. That will not stop them but only fuel their fire and progress their actions. If you must retaliate, speak and act with grace and dignity. Do not argue, but offer intelligent rebuttal and opinion. Show them that you have the maturity to hold your composure.

It is important to remember...
Haters are often confused admirers, and can be converted over time when they finally figure out that their hating is getting them no where. But with success comes even more haters. Develop a strong sense of self and keep the ones that support and care for you and your dreams close to you.

The Protector

This is most often attributed to parents, close relatives, and friends. This kind of dream killer has your best intentions at heart, even though may not realize that they may be influencing you to give up on their dreams in order to settle for a more realistic goal. Their weapon is their heart. They want to protect you from the trials and pains of failure that they may very well have experienced themselves. However, they do so without realizing that they may be stifling your drive to succeed altogether.

How to deal with a protector?
Especially if you have a close relationship with the protector, it is important to confide in them. Listen to their concerns and console them of their worries. It is comforting for protectors if you tell them of your well-thought out plans to reach your goals. Make them realize how strong your passion is so they understand how much your dreams shape who you are and who you are meant to become.

It is important to remember...
Protectors want what's best for you so it's important to show them kindness and compassion. They may simply not understand your plight. It will take lots of communication and patience. Remember, protectors can convert into believers and supporters.

The Pessimist

This is the kind of person that reminds you of the statistics, the odds, the obstacles, the limitations, especially in a dwindling economy. Their weapon is their mind. They use such principles like logic, experience, and rationality to overcome one's wild aspirations. Rare feats are often deemed as fantasy and absurdity. Unlike a hater, a pessimist doesn't focus on demeaning your dreams personally. In fact, they may very well see the potential in you. However, they concern themselves the current realities and often cannot see the possibilities beyond the conventional.

How to deal with a pessimist?
Pessimism is a personality characteristic. Many people are naturally inclined to be pessimistic. My advice is to surround yourself with people that do have confidence in you. If the pessimist is only bringing negativity without reason, do not concern that person with your dreams and stay focused on your own goals.

It is important to remember that...
Not all negative criticism is bad. You should develop a mental filter. It takes in the criticism that will cause the artist to grow and improve in one's skills and abilities.

The Inner Critic

This dream killer's weapon, much like the hater's, is their insecurities. This person often feels like their time and energy is wasted when something does not work out. They feel like they are on a lost path with no signs or detours. They minimize their potential with feelings of self-doubt, frustration, confusion, anxiety, and impatience. They also are most likely to be affected by the other three kinds of dream killers. But the most dangerous thing about this dream killer is obvious: the inner critic is yourself. And if you don't believe in your dreams, why should anyone else?

How to deal with your inner critic?
One thing you can do is change your mindset. This is difficult with an experienced inner critic who has dealt with self-doubt most their life. You have to work towards having peace about where you are and know you can evolve. Also it is crucial to practice your craft. You will have less to be critical about if you improve at what you do. Always make time in your daily busy life for your dreams and recreations. Chances are, you will not reach your goals overnight. So its important to make decisions that are best for you, while remaining hopeful and optimistic for a brighter future.

It is important to remember that...
The truth is everyone has an inner critic. The trick is figuring out how to keep it from being an obstacle in your life. Don't let anyone get in the way of what you are destined to do. Especially don't let that person be you.

Here are a few tips that can help you to keep your dreams and goals alive while repelling the effects of dream killers:

• Dream big. Dream hard. 
• Meet people that have "made it" and ask questions.
• Make a thorough and detailed plan of action. 
• Keep focus. Limit distraction.
• Surround yourself with supporters.
• Listen to feedback/positive critique.
• Move forward. Don't worry about what happened before.
• Practice your skills. You are never too good for improvement.
• See things to completion. Build a reputation for persistence and endurance.
• Have no regrets. Learn from the mistakes and use them to grow.

~L~